Tattered & Torn Read online

  “You warming up?” he asked. I nodded mutely and kept my eyes fixed on the glass and his reflection, or what I could see of it.

  “Okay, we’ll get your car dropped off and I’ll take you home,” he said and pulled onto the old country road.

  “I don’t have a home. At least not really,” I didn’t think I had said it aloud but obviously I did because he responded.

  “Well, we’ll get you to your cousin’s in any case.”

  I watched the reflection of his shoulder give an indelicate shrug. I let out a pent up breath, why the hell couldn’t Reaver have just come and gotten me and sent Ghost for the damn car later? I frowned, brow wrinkling, a small voice in the back of my mind reminding me, because he was working you idiot! And it was true, and very unfair of me to wish for my cousin. He’d taken enough time off recently warring with his ex over their son and getting settled into his new life with Hayden who was great for Reaver, she really was, but I couldn’t help but be jealous.

  I missed my cousin and I felt like I needed him now more than ever and it wasn’t fair to him or Hayden me moving in like I’d had to, but there was Reaver, ever my Captain Save-A-Ho. When it had been the choice of homeless, moving in with my mother or moving my shit into storage and me into their guest room my cousin hadn’t hesitated. I closed my eyes and rested my temple against the cool dark glass of Ghost’s passenger window.

  His phone went off in his breast pocket and I turned my head to look, he extracted an iPhone in a thick, ugly, neon yellow case that was grease stained. I made a face at it and he smiled at me a genuine smile.

  “May be ugly but it’s easy to spot in the dark,” he gave another one of those one shouldered shrugs of his and answered the phone with, “Pauley’s towing; this is Derek how can I help?” I rested my head back against the rest and closed my eyes, listening to the timbre of his voice as he spoke to whoever on the other end of the line.

  “I’m on a tow out on Abbey Country Road right now, I still have to drop the car over at Open Road Garage sooooo,” he paused, “ETA an hour and a half? Maybe. Uh huh. Yeah. Good deal. Yeah, you too,” he hung up and we rode in silence for a while. He didn’t have the radio on and the monotonous sound of the rushing pavement and diesel engine in combination with the warmth of the cab lulled me, I went from tired to sleepy in the blink of an eye but I didn’t sleep well these days. Still, moving along in the closed space of Ghost’s truck, wrapped in warmth and the smell of his cologne, I think I fell asleep.

  Chapter 2

  Ghost…

  I pulled up at Open Road Garage and looked Shelly over. She looked like hell, her platinum blonde locks shaggy and lank against her forehead which was furrowed with deep lines as she slept. Dark circles stained her too pale skin beneath her eyes and she’d always been a narrow woman but now she was positively gaunt. Her sharp cheekbone standing out further than I’d ever remembered; her cheeks had become so drawn they were shadowed beneath them. I looked down at the hand that had slipped from her lap to the seat between us, her once carefully filed, painted and manicured nails, barely held onto the chipped polish now. To top it off, they had been bitten damn near to the quick. Even in her sleep she was tense, tucked tight against the door as far as she could get from me.

  It was a damned shame. One of the things that had first attracted me to Shelly was her surety and confidence. She had been a vibrant spitfire of a woman, a real fireball, and now… well now she was barely a shadow of that girl. A ghost of who she once was and the guilt of that weighed on me.

  My personal cell went off and I scrambled to answer it before it woke her up. I was so used to answering the work cell I did it without thinking,

  “Pauley’s towing this is Derek, how can I help?”

  “What the fuck. Ghost?” Reaver laughed on the other end of the line. I frowned.

  “You didn’t tell me she wasn’t sleeping,” I said, and I knew my voice was thick with displeasure, tumbling into the too warm cab of my truck and lost to the dark. Sort of like Shelly seemed to be.

  “Yeah man. It’s pretty bad. Nightmares all of the time,” Reaver sighed out on the other end of the phone and sounded about as tired as Shelly looked.

  “She’s sleeping now. I’m at the shop about to drop her car. I’m hesitant about waking her up so I’m just gonna let her sleep. I’ll bring her home when she wakes up,” I said.

  “Yeah man, might not be a bad idea. I know Hayden could use a good night’s too so yeah, okay. Just…” he hesitated like he was afraid he was going to offend me by saying it but I knew what was coming just like he knew it went without saying. “Just take care of my Baby Cuz.”

  “You know it, man,” I said and we said our goodbyes and hung up. I sat there a little longer than I should have and just let myself drink her in. Even as worn and tattered as she was she still had this air about her, this pride or just, I don’t know… The girl was tough as nails and would get past this but she was stubborn as hell too. I got out of the truck and got her car dropped. I was pretty sure it was her alternator which was a pretty quick and easy fix if Dray could get the part. I got back into the truck and damned if she hadn’t stirred a bit. She was out like a traffic light.

  With a rough exhale I put my truck in gear and went for my next tow. Shelly slept on through the next three which were all no passenger deals and the fourth was supposed to be too so you can imagine my surprise when I pulled up to find a dude sitting there. He waved me down and I took a nervous last look at Shells. She’d been out a solid three or four hours by now which was good and it was nice having her along, in my truck with me. Even with her asleep it was less lonely somehow. I shifted it into park and I got out to see what was doin’ with the dude.

  “Thought this was a no ride tow,” I said simply, but held out my hand to shake his anyways.

  “Was supposed to be but my damned brother wouldn’t answer his phone,” the guy grunted. He looked to be in his twenties, maybe thirties, “Is it a problem?” he asked.

  “Naw. I’ll figure something out,” I said and he looked back to the truck and squinted.

  “She’s pretty, what’s the matter with her?” he asked. I felt my lips thin down as I pressed them together. Guess it was pretty obvious to everyone.

  “Nothing,” I lied, “Just a friend along for the ride. Gimee just a sec to get your car hooked up.”

  I pulled on my gloves and started rigging up the guy’s Mustang. I was so busy making sure I didn’t crush myself somewhere that I had stopped paying attention to the dude. Big mistake because the next thing I know I hear Shelly shriek like all holy hell. I stood up and cracked my head on the underside of the ‘stang. My eyes watering I didn’t take the time to process the pain. I jerked my head up. Dude had my passenger side door open and Shelly was plastered back against my driver’s door. Dude had his hands up, eyes wide and I leapt over the tow arm and went around to my door.

  I didn’t think about it. I just opened it and Shelly spilled out backwards with a short bleat of unexpected terror right as I caught her. I wrapped my arms around her lithe form and crushed her back to my chest. Her legs out in front of her but not supporting her, if they had been she’d have been taller than me, as it was, her head was tucked neatly under my chin, her arms crushed to her sides so she wouldn’t flail.

  “Easy Princess! I gotcha,” I said and her chest heaving she went limp with, I think, relief.

  “Jesus Ghost!” she barked and began to struggle in my grasp, but I was having none of it, holding her fast. “Let me go!” she shouted.

  “Nuh-uh, not until I’m sure you’re not going to hit me,” I told her and she gasped, indignant and started to struggle with more fury but I had her fast. I grinned, I couldn’t help it. An echo of the fireball was in there somewhere and I loved it when she put up a fight.

  “Please let me go!” she cried and her voice was tinged with such a desperate fear it wiped the grin right off my face. I did what she asked and immediately relinquished my hold on her. She got
her feet under her and took several steps away, chest heaving.

  “Easy Baby. You’re okay. Deep breaths,” I took a slow deep exaggerated breath for her benefit and she unconsciously mimicked me. I locked eyes with her, nodded slowly and took several more breaths until she seemed steadier. Her sapphire eyes lost some of their panic, the fear quickly turning to the old standby spark of anger.

  “What the fuck Ghost!?” she shouted.

  “Yeah!” the guy echoed from behind me. I held up an index finger in his direction where he’d come around the front of my truck.

  “You fell asleep Princess, Reaver and I thought it best to let you stay that way. He wasn’t supposed to be here, I was gonna wake you as soon as I got the car hooked up. Didn’t mean to scare you Shells but you’re exhausted…” I tried to reason, but she cut me off, that stubborn set to her chin coming out to play.

  “Seriously!? You were supposed to take me home you asshole!” she cried. I gave her a baleful look and she swallowed hard, glancing at dude. While I enjoyed the banter and the healthy debates we’d had in the past, I wouldn’t be disrespected. Especially not in front of a customer.

  “Sorry,” she said and smoothed down her sweater in the front. She’d caught my look full meaning and apologized to the guy.

  “Hey, no worries. I really didn’t mean to scare you,” he gave her a smile and she nodded. She still looked spooked and when I took a step forward she immediately fell back a step of her own. I sighed inwardly but kept my outward appearance steady for her benefit.

  “You’re okay Baby,” I murmured consolingly and she pursed her lips.

  “Except I’m not!” she blurted and her eyes filled up with the hurt I knew was in there, but just the hurt, no tears.

  “I’m really not,” she said. I found myself nodding. I knew this was big but I had no idea why she’d picked me, or right now to open up, but as quickly as she had she shut right back down when dude spoke.

  “I’m Ron,” he said and took a halting step forward, holding out his hand to shake.

  “Shelly,” she stepped forward and shook his hand quickly then immediately bounded back out of reach.

  “I really am sorry I scared you,” he said and she nodded, her eyes fixed on me.

  “It’s okay. I didn’t realize I’d fallen asleep. I uh, I don’t sleep too well these days,” she swallowed. Ron laughed.

  “I’m not a morning person either,” he ventured. Shelly’s brows knit and she came at me abruptly. I held my ground; held still as she grabbed me by the shoulders and turned me into the light spilling from the cab of my truck. She hissed, that sound you make when something looks like it hurts and I was a bit mollified by the fast change in her demeanor.

  “You’re bleeding Ghost,” she informed me and dug around in her purse. She pulled out one of those travel packs of those Kleenexes, stripped the plastic off them and pressed the whole wad to the back of my head which instantaneously gave a giant throb and started stinging like a son of a bitch. I grimaced.

  “Cracked my head a good one under the car,” I said and replaced her hand with mine. The Kleenex’s were soaking through pretty quick. “First aid kit is behind the seat, let me finish hooking this up,” I said and went to work. Shelly got the kit out and thrust a flashlight at Ron.

  “Here, I need an extra set of hands,” she said and he smiled and nodded. I wrapped up quickly and got the Mustang up and ready to roll. Ron was in the truck holding the flashlight beam where Shelly directed it and I stood obediently under it.

  “Scalp cuts always bleed like a son of a bitch,” she complained and pressed some gauze to it. She moved my hair aside combing it with her fingers and I guess inspected the cut. My eyes were fixed on the dark asphalt of the roadway. Couldn’t stop the pleasant tingling of her fingers in my hair if I wanted to so I tried to focus on that sensation rather than the angry throbbing my head was starting up with.

  “How bad is it?” I asked because it was sure starting to just plain hurt.

  “I don’t think it’s going to need stitches. It’s really not that big, I think you hit it just right. You’re shirt’s toast unless I can get it into some hydrogen peroxide sooner rather than later.” She held the gauze bandage tight to the back of my skull for a minute or two, checking under it once or twice.

  “We good?” I asked when she left it off for a moment or two longer than she had any of the previous times.

  “Yeah, it’s stopped,” she said.

  I turned around. Ron scooted back across the seat and settled on the passenger side. I looked at Shelly with a faint smile and said, “Up you go Princess,” murmuring loud enough for just her ears, “You’re safe as long as I’m here.”

  She pulled herself up, stopping midway to say, “That’s the problem Ghost, you’re hardly ever here.”

  She settled into the center of my bench seat and I pulled myself up after her and got behind the wheel, contemplating what she’d said and I realized, she was right. I aimed to fix that in a real big damned hurry. I just didn’t know how I was going to do it yet.

  Ron chatted amicably with Shelly on the ride to his house. She sat stiffly between us and politely answered his questions, though the answers she gave were the bare minimum. The more he talked and the more he showed an interest in her, the more her thigh pressed against mine which secretly gave me a thrill, which then made me feel guilty as hell for feeling that way. I dropped the Mustang and Ron in his driveway and took care of all of the paperwork. Once I was back in the truck, no sooner had my driver’s door clicked shut Shelly’s head turned sharply in my direction.

  “You never, and I mean ever do that to me again! You arrogant jackass!” she seethed. She crossed her arms over her chest and the only thing that kept me from believing it was in righteous anger was the way her shoulders rounded forward, hunching in the dark. I pursed my lips to keep myself from saying anything regrettable and counted to ten in my head.

  “First off, why aren’t you sleeping? Secondly, I didn’t do shit to you Shelly. You fell asleep and I let you, so you can get your wadded up panties out of your ass and see it for what it was!”

  “Oh and what’s that?” she snorted.

  “Doing you a fucking favor Princess.”

  Shelly’s head snapped around and she stared resolutely out the passenger side window, my proclamation met with a stony silence. Shit. So much for not saying anything regrettable. I let out a pent up breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding.

  “Shelly look at me,” I said, her jaw tightened and she continued to give me the cold shoulder.

  “Shelly…” I tried more gently but she cut me off.

  “Just take me home Ghost,” her voice held sorrow and the bitter tone of regret.

  “Not until you look at me,” I said and switched off the truck to prove my point. She threw up her hands and looked at me incredulously, sapphire eyes wide with annoyance.

  “I’m sorry,” I said and her expression went from annoyed, to confused, to skeptical each one chasing the other across her fair face.

  “Okay,” she nodded, her brow furrowed as she searched my face, trying to decide if I was sincere or if I was lying to her no doubt.

  “No lie,” I said softly, “You’re right, I should have taken you home Babe, but you look exhausted and…” I could see I was losing her, her scowl deepening “That’s no excuse so I’m sorry.” She searched my face and after a moment or two her skepticism dissipated, she nodded slowly.

  “Instant karma,” she said judiciously and it was my turn to frown.

  “What?” I asked, genuinely perplexed.

  “Your head. Chalk it up to instant karma. Now can you please take me home?” I winced, my head throbbed like a mother now that it’d been brought up, but I nodded anyways and started up the truck. We drove in silence for a while, me paying attention to the road inside the reach of my headlights, her staring blankly, somberly out the window at the blur of passing dark.

  “Will you get in trouble?” she asked
softly.

  “Trouble for what?” I asked frowning.

  “For having me with you, if that guy complains or something… Will you get in trouble?” I smiled.

  “Well according to you my boss is a dick,” I said grinning. She frowned at me.

  “How do you mean?” she asked and her expression was tempestuous. I laughed.

  “I’m my own boss Princess,” I clarified, “Pauley’s towing is mine.”

  “Oh, I knew your name was Derek, I never knew your last name,” she shrugged a shoulder.

  “Didn’t?” I asked surprised. She turned back out the window.

  “No, didn’t seem important,” she said.

  Ouch.

  “I didn’t mean it like that,” she said exasperated and I caught her rolling her eyes in her reflection in the darkened window glass. “Don’t look so butt hurt,” which made me smile. I liked that she was watching me.

  “If you grew up with Reaver you would understand,” she muttered.

  “Was his name really Rhett Butler?” I knew it was but I just wanted her to keep talking so I tried to put a convincing amount of skepticism into my voice when I asked. I missed the mark I think.

  “You know damned well it was,” she said, her tone colored with exasperation. We lapsed back into silence but I can’t say it was an uncomfortable one. We’d just run out of things to say. I kept stealing glances at Shelly who stared vacantly out the window, thoughtfully chewing her lip.

  “What’re you thinking about so hard over there, Princess?” I asked. She let out a pent up breath in a whoosh of air and pinched the bridge of her nose, closing her eyes.